Paying for Trump’s Wall – A Modest Proposal

We all know that Trump’s Wall will be huuge. What is underappreciated is that it could easily pay for itself!

The wall will be high and mostly smooth (see below for the exception). My brother has observed that this is ideal for certain kinds of sports – handball (a love of our father’s) in particular, as well as squash and racketball. Locating playing courts along the wall with a small fee for use, perhaps with documented immigrants playing for free on certain days would bring in some income which would offset wall maintenance costs.

But, we could have larger money infustions from naming rights and from advertisements. Think of the pride you could have by naming a section for a year – The John Smith Memorial Section, or the Brotherhood of Groundhogs wall region! The advertising possibilities are endless – static painted ads for local merchants, multiple section ads for larger corporations, electronic LED signs for malls, and the occasional public service announcement or weather forecast. On big game days, seats could be arranged to watch the sports with reasonable admission fees.

Since this wall runs mostly east-west, building an overhang on the US side will provide us with some shade, while the overhang itself can support solar panels. The power generated here can be sold locally. This delightful shaded open-air space is ideal for restaurants, bars and bistros whose fees would add to the finances. Of course, a small number of sections can be set aside as complementary spaces for school children to sell lemonade.

America’s interest in fitness would be recognized by setting aside an occasional section for wall-climbing exercises, complete with the rubber padding at the bottom and precision protrustions of varying degrees of difficulty for practice.

This could turn out the be a real money-maker. We should start planning for a Canadian border version soon!